I've been thinking a lot lately. I've been real messed up in everything. It's just... I don't know what I'm doing now. Ever since that stupid fall everything in my life just went haywire. Ever since the construction relations cock up. I'm not trying to be precise here. But it's just one of those, "I feel weird. My mind isn't stable" kinda days.

WHY? WHY? WHY?
Questions.
We all want them answered. But goodness... I think it's all a big mistake.

SIGH. I bet you don't know what I'm talking. But this is just a way to vent my frustrations with I don't even know why I'm feeling so miserable.

Wonder... why have I been bringing my own lunch to school? HMM... I still haven't found a bad response to it. But so far it's been good. I like the porridge and whatever home cooked food. I'm so lucky ain't I? The only thing is it takes up a lot of space, and it garners attention, and it get cold after a cold morning in the lecture theatre.

The plus is: I don't always have to deal with queues, same food, SAME FOOD, SAME FOOD! And I don't even need to fork out a single cent for my lunch. Yeah. From my pocket money. Yes. I still get money from my mum coz' I don't work. Such a kid! But yeah. I only get $20 a week now because I only have 2 days of school - a week.

ALRIGHT. I'm feeling better already...

This thing really helps. It gets stuff out, although I can't get everything out. It gets stuff out.
Out of my chest. -bangbangbang- hahaha... What am I doing?

OH WELL... what else...
You know, what am I going to do with the fact that I speak so softly that I tend to be ignored a lot of times? Or that I can't bring myself to poke into a conversation once its started nor hold well group conversations?

it's not being anti-social.

But some people seem to just wanna make a big deal out of it by poking in and drawing out the negative attributes. -so depressed-

Why is it that sometimes people get the impression, or a lot of times, some people tend to think that I AM DAO? That Jia Zhen is TOTALLY ARROGANT and speaks to NO ONE? Goodness. My voice tends to go weee~ out of control... BBUT... if I don't get what people are talking and don't dare to ask lest people think I'm nosey then am I being all anti-social and WEIRD? Am I? Oh yeah. They say oh! Jia Zhen is such a weird girl. Loner. Outcast. Unfriendly. Doesn't smile.

OH I HOPE and I KNOW I've changed. But getting used to a person takes time for me... I'm real... UGH. not that sociable and not that outspoken... nor am I an extrovert. Totally not Sagittarius-like. BUT you know, who cares about horoscope? I've read that stuff so much it pretty much riddles and more riddles. Haha...

Well. What a random rant. It's that fall I tell you... I'm not keeping anymore terrapins. You'll get an awful shock if you see my primary 4 and 5 photos. I look real bad. REAL BAD.

slow. laughed at. slow. laughed at. never did very well. never did achieved much. laughed at.

It's just that self-concious factor coming in. I shall stop my wallowing in self-pity and rubbish. I've got cool buddies now, and I'm glad. (sigh)

*shrug, shudder and smile*

Now, what a way to celebrate my 300th post? YES! This is my 300th post! hooray for me will you? My blog has 300 posts now.